Friendships

I find the nature of friendships fascinating. Since I was born I've moved house countless times (there was a time between the ages of 14 and 16 where I joked I was homeless as my family kept moving between 3 houses), and I've moved schools 7 times, including going to College.

I began in nursery in Surrey, then moved to Wales were I attended an all welsh school (being a 4 year old from England, in one of the Welshest part of Wales not being able to speak a word of welsh isn't easy). I stayed here until I was 10, when my parents dragged me out to live in France for 6 months and I attended school here), I moved back to Wales ready for Year 6. Then when it was time for high school, I went to the place where the majority of my class was going; an all welsh high school. I regretted this almost immediately and after a few issues, I convinced my parents to move me for year 8 to a bi-lingual school. I stayed here until 6th form, where I moved to an all-girls boarding school before finally moving to Manchester to go to Music College. Mixed in with the various schools, I've had musical commitments, I attended a Saturday stage school, and was in the Girl Guding family for 10 years.

What I'm trying to say is that I've had many friends over the years. 

But what I find interesting, is how they come and go, and how do you know that you've found a friend for life or if they are what I call a "friend for convenience". I know this isn't the most pleasant way of calling a friend, and I often haven't worked them out until after I've left them. We all have them, the friends that we look back on and think "actually, I was only friends with them because they were there and I saw them every day" and you realised that you never really saw them outside of school or whatnot. 

Friends come and go, we all know that. In my first secondary school, I was bullied pretty bad which was one of the reasons I left. When I did leave, I felt that I had no friends whatsoever in that school, ironically, two of my closest friends went to that school, and I believe (and hope) that they'll both be my friends for life. Granted, one of them did go to my primary school, and there's a running joke between my primary school classmates that we have unusually close relationship. There were 27 of us in the class, and if i saw any one of these in the street we'd exchange an "aright?" as if I saw them yesterday and I was going to see them tomorrow, even if I haven't seen them in about 2 years, because (I only speak for myself here) I feel so comfortable with them that I don't feel I need to say anything more. Don't get me wrong, I love meeting up with them and having a proper catchup, but one of them once said "I think we have a special bond cause we all went to primary together" and I completely agree.

Through having all these changing people in my life, I've come to realise that friendships are often a two-way relationship. It takes equal effort on both parties two make a relationship work. Sometimes, I have lost friends because I realised that it was me making all the effort, and although it always upsets me losing a friend, I have never regretted it. I always try and have people in my life who enrich it, and who want me in their life. 

Others, I've just lost contact as we've both gone away to university, or they've moved country, but I know that if I were to call them up, it would be as if we haven't not spoken at all and we'd yabber on as if no time has passed whatsoever. My best friend and I from sixth form are a bit like this. I can text her the day before and say "can I stay with you tomorrow night?" and it's fine. We text each other the most stupidest things, even if we haven't spoken in weeks, and I can't wait until she comes and visits me in May! 

Weirdly enough, the people I am closest to are the people I don't seem to see every day. I best friend, Cariad, lived in Surrey with me. When I moved to Wales, we pretty much lost contact apart from Christmas and birthday cards and such, until one Christmas. She sent a card when we were 11 with her msn address, so naturally I went and added her straight away. Since then we've spoken non stop and I can tell her everything and anything, and I know I'll have her support no matter what, and I'd do anything for her too. But we also both know that if I had stayed in Surrey, we highly doubt that we'd be as good friends now. 

Walking around College, I see my friends (old and new) and I wonder if those that I fell out with will ever see past what happened (see the Boy Troubles pat below) and I wonder if I'll still talk to my friends in 20 years time. My best friend in College, I don't know what I'd do without her. She's the one person here that will tell me the truth, even if I don't want to hear it. I really do hope that I stay in contact with everyone from College. 

I look at all the people who've been in my life, and it know that I wouldn't be the person I am now if even one of those people hadn't been there. I think of them sometimes and I wonder if they think of me. Each person has helped me become the person I am, and I am so very grateful to each and every one of them. 

Pet Peeves

Everyone has their little pet peeves, you know, the little things that irritate them. I always try to be positive and look on the bright side of life, but some things really do rub me up the wrong way.
I sometimes feel that I may have a little more than others, so I'm going to share some of them with the rest of the world.

Texting
I absolutely cannot stand the sound of phone buttons when people are texting. Blackberries were the worst for this. When I was in sixth form, pretty much everyone had a Blackberry, and so pretty much everyone had the incredibly irritating clicking sound that went with it. Especially when if we were in class, and we were doing some work quietly, there would always be the click click click click of a blackberry. Now that touch screen phones are all the rage, this particular annoyance doesn't appear quite that frequently.

Rudeness
I doubt I'm alone in this one. People who seem to not hold open a door for you even if you're just a step behind, or people who don't say thank you after you've held open the door, or people who are just plain arsey. I know that everyone has bad days and good days, and some people are nicer than others, and I definitely know that sometimes, you say something that can come across quite rudely, but I try not to do it on purpose. I don't understand how people can be so mean and not give a consideration about other people's feelings. I try to go out of my way to be nice, to hold open doors, to let someone through first, to smile and people, always say please and thank you. Its not difficult, and I just like to think that, maybe, I'll be remembered as the person who picked up that something you dropped that one time. Manners cost nothing.

Head-Patting
I hate it when people pat my head. I think it must have something to do with the fact that I'm short. I'm 5ft 3.5, so I'm not tiny, but I've always been the shortest in my group of friends. I also say stupid things sometimes without meaning to, and people would always go "Aw there there" and follow it up with a pat on the head. I find it incredibly irritating and patronising (see what I did there?). But yeah, please don't do it.

Crumbs
I hate crumbs. Crumbs get everywhere. Crumbs in the butter, crumbs in the marmite, crumbs in the fridge, crumbs on the worktop. No matter how many times you clean them up, they come back.

Whispering
Oooooh, the sound of other people whispering really grates on me. Imagine, you're in a lecture in university, it's quite interesting, starting to actually learn something, and suddenly you can hear "pssspshpsspshhphpssh" from behind. The breathy sound of whispering, I swear it's more distracting than actual talking. This leads me straight onto my next one:

People Not Turning Up to Lectures
Although the Whisperers mentioned above are annoying, at least they made the effort to turn up to the lecture. Everyone has skipped a lecture, you wake up and think "nah, I'm really not feeling it today" and so you don't go. But when it's the same people over and over who don't turn up for the lecture and think it's okay? No, its not okay. You have taken out a massive student loan to pay your £9000 tuition fees, you could at least have the decency to turn up to your lectures. We have 5 lectures a week, 7 hours. It's not that hard. Really.

Practice Room Stealers
Well, stealing isn't quite the right word, but in college, we have a practice room booking system, and there are days where all the rooms get booked very quickly. However, some people don't turn up to their room. If you're not going to go, either cancel it, or don't book it in the first place. Do the rest of us who actually want to practice a favour. Thanks.